Light and darkness, Hope and despair
by Kataang9
Summary: I figured the title might be a little weak, but I couldn't think of a better one. Anyways, Lightning and Hope are now going to separate ways, cause of a little argument they have after the battle of Odin. Soon after they're long gone, Lightning goes back to find Hope, and helps the boy overcome his despair.


**A/N: I sometimes think that moment when Lightning wanted to leave Hope to fond for himself would have been different. After the Odin fight, Lightning still wants to leave him, but shortly regrets that decision.**

**Note the song I'm using is Kimi Ga Iru Kara from the Japanese version of the game. However, I'm using the English version some you tuber made. I would share the link, but this website won't allow me. Honestly, why is Fanfiction doing this to us? Can't poke links, even on private messages. I had to put spaces in between each letter of the link just to put it through. It's a pain in the butt I tell yea. I can imagine it's worse for the receiver to remove those spaces from the link.**

**Anyways, the video is Fimi Ga Iru Kara (English Version / FFXIII) uploaded by Abrisaurus. Apparently, as it's said in the description her friend wrote the lyrics and she sang it. I love the song, I'm not too sure about her singing, but it's fine. But alas, I can only find the official song on iTunes in Japanese. I curse Japan for having all the fun!**

* * *

After certain events back in Lake Bresha, Lightning and the rest of the group leaves Snow behind and escaped. They crash landed in the Vile Peaks. The team tries to escape while the army is still on their tail. Eventually, the group divided into two.

Lightning and Hope are heading to Eden to get revenge on the Sanctum, and Snow in Hope's case. Sazh and Vanille are...well, just running away. Lightning isn't fond with having Hope following her, mostly cause she doesn't want to babysit the kid.

Lightning arrives at some bridge by the waterfall. Hope slowly follows her from behind, until he trips and falls. Lightning stops in place, she's had it. "This isn't working." Lightning looks back at Hope. "I mean you're a liability. You'll just slow me down."

Hope stands up in disappointment. "What?"

"I'm sorry, but I can't protect you when-" Lightning gasps in pain as her brand glows.

"You can't leave me here, you've gotta take me with you!" Hope yells.

"ENOUGH! The whole world is against us." Lightning falls onto one knee, gripping at her chest. "I can barely keep myself alive. Let alone some helpless kid! Ugh! I don't have time to baby you. You want to get tough?" Lightning looks back at Hope. "Do it on your own!"

Just then, a large pink ring appears underneath Lightning's feet. Realizing her situation, Lightning runs ahead, out of the way. A pulse explosion happens and Odin appears right from the summoning circle.

"This cannot be happening!" Odin leaps towards Hope, ready to strike. Hope steps back and falls on his butt. Odin makes a strike, Hope cowers. "Look out!"

Lightning rushes in and blocks that hit. Hope gets back on his feet and helps Lightning face Odin. In the end, Lightning earns Odin's trust and the eidolon vanishes into Lightning's brand.

Lightning's exhausted from the pain and the fight. She feels on her knees. "Lightning!" Hope rushes in front of Lightning. He looks at the brand on his wrist, then at Lighting's glowing one. "Your brand looks different. Was that an eidolon? Like l'Cie can summon?"

The glow ends and the pain fades. "Magic and mumbo-jumbo. I must have hit my head on that purge train." Lightning stands up.

"Hm..." Hope looks down in shame. "Am I...really in your way?"

Lightning doesn't answer. She puts her Gunblade away then walks ahead. Hope suddenly worries when he sees the soldier girl walking away. "L-Lightning? You're still leaving me?"

Lightning stops on her tracks. "I told you, I don't have time to baby you. You're just gonna slow me down."

"But...But..." Hope isn't sure is words are gonna help him. "I'll do better, I'll try harder. I promise. Please just take me with you."

Lightning sighs, wither annoyed. The boy can't seem to take a hint. Lightning looks over her shoulder at Hope. "I'm sorry...but the answer is no."

Hope is pretty hurtful. "Wha..." Lightning looks ahead and continues to walk away.

Hope looks down, his fists shaken. He's pretty upset that Lightning is doing this to him. It's Snow Villiers all over again. Tears fills in his eyes, but they don't escape. Frustrated, Hope yells at Lightning.

"So that's it! You're just gonna abandon me like that!" Lightning stops in place hearing that. "You just don't care at all, do you! All you ever care about is yourself! You are cold and mean and heartless and I hate you! I hate you, I hate you, I HATE YOU!" Lightning can suddenly feel her anger raising. She tries hard to resist yelling back at the kid. "You are just like Snow! My mom died because of him and all he cares about is that sister of yours! And now you're just gonna leave me behind when I need you!"

Lightning doesn't answer. She just stands there in silence. She never expected Hope to get into a rage fit like that. She doesn't know what hurts more, the kid's suffering or the insults he yelled at her, even if it is true.

Lightning remains quiet for too long. "You know what? Fine! Get out of here! You can leave me here to rot for all I care! I'll get tough on my own! You'll see!" Hope runs away, back up the path they came from. "You'll see!"

Soon enough, Hope was out of sight. Lightning just stands in place, soaking in what Hope said to her. She can't believe that he said those things to her. Of course she's more surprised that his yelling slowed her down. Usually, the girl doesn't let mentions get in her way.

Lightning looks behind her. She can see that Hope is long gone. Even though she already knows that, she had to see for herself. Lightning looks forward and sighs.

"He's on his own now, Farron. Just keep moving." Lightning moves on ahead.

Now Lightning and Hope are going their separate ways. Lightning walks on the rumble junk on her path. Enough though she's not showing it, she's bothered by Hope's words. They even echo inside her head.

'You just don't care at all!'

'You are just like Snow'

'You are cold and mean and heartless and I hate you!'

Lightning remembers a time when Serah was like that when their parents died and Lightning had to take charge, and when she forbid Serah to be dating Snow. That time, Serah felt like being treated like a baby. She's eighteen now and she can take care of herself, even when dating other boys.

Those thoughts running through her head didn't stop her, but it did distracted her pretty well. Lightning felt a single rain drop fall on her and she reacted by taking our her weapon and ready to strike, as if it felt like something ravenous is pouncing on her. Seeing it's nothing, Lightning looks up. It's starting to pour.

Hope still runs away. He's not happy being on his own, but he knows that Lightning's not gonna bother to keep the kid with her. Hope stops in place. He stops to catch his breath. The kid bends down with his hands on his knees, then falls onto his knees. He slowly starts to cry. Under all that rage and exhaustion, he's still sad about everything that's happened.

The rain catches up on the boy and it starts to poor. Just what the kid needs, to get soaked in the nighttime rain. Hope now tries to seek some shelter.

Lightning runs down the run, hovering her arms over her head. The soldier girl seeks shelter for the night, to hide from the rain and the army. Soon enough, Lightning finds an old war ship that supports as some cave. Without hesitation, the soldier rushes in, shading herself from the rain. Once she's in the dry, she looks around, armed and ready to attack. She wants to make sure there isn't any monsters or soldiers inside.

It's completely empty. Once that's done, Lightning sits on the floor, a foot on the ground and her other leg laying down, with her weapon at hand in gun mode. She rests for the night while keeping watch, just so she doesn't get ambushed. As soon as she is, her stomach is growling. She's gonna have to get some food.

Hope is sitting out in the rain, completely soaked. He's repeatly spinning a stick in a pile of sticks, trying to make fire for warmth. If only he would learn his chances of doing that while out in the rain are...Zero. Less then zero. It's...neg-finity.

After five minutes of trying, Hope just gives up. Drops the stick right in the pile. He slides back until he's against the cliff, where there's only so little to shade him from the rain. Hope huddles, holds his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around him, shivering. The boy is pretty cold. His stomach is growling as well.

Hope knows he's hungry but he can't do anything about it. He doesn't have that kind of survival skill, or stamina that Lightning does. He thinks about Lightning, how she's doing. But he just casts her off, knowing the girl isn't gonna come back. He tries to shut his mind off about everything that's happened, but he can't.

Back at Lightning, she's eating a piece of Behemoth Steak from her weapon, in front of the warm fire. Lightning went out and find some Behemoth to kill for food, and something to burn for a warm fire and to cook her food. It went pretty wall.

After eating, Lightning goes back to rest. Of course, as soon as she does, she can't turn off Hope's voice in her head. His words just reply like a communicator inside of her brain, with no way of turning it off or to ignore it. The next line from Hope is what broke her wall.

'My mom died because of him! Because of him. Because of him.'

Lightning reaches into her pocket, taking out the survival knife that Serah had given her for her birthday. Looking down at it, she thinks back to that day:

_"If you really are a l'Cie. It's my job to deal with you." Lightning says._

_Serah pretty much ran away crying. Snow stayed behind to argue with Lightning. "Why won't you believe her!?"_

_"You kidding me? She gets made a l'Cie and you pop the question?" Lightning asks._

_Snow slammed his hands on the table. "Lightning stop it!"_

_Lightning slams her hands on the table. "No you stop it! Get out of my house!"_

_"You're shutting her out! She's your sister!" Snow says._

That last line just echoes in her head. Snow is right. Serah is her sister. She struggled to tell Lightning the truth about being made a l'Cie. Serah knew that Lightning would be real mad about it, and yet, she told him. And Lightning knows why, it's because she's her sister, the only family she has left, and how did Lightning treat her? Like a threat. And now Serah's gone because of the way Lightning treated her.

She can suddenly see Hope in the place of Serah. The kid is just as harmless and vulnerable as Serah was. Lightning can already imagine how Hope's doing out on his own. He's probably starving, struggling to survive. Either captured by PSICOM or dying in the claws of a Behemoth.

The very image of Hope in danger suddenly scares Lightning. Lightning takes a deep sigh. "What have I done?"

Lightning runs out in the rain, as fast as she could. She retreats back n the path she was taking. She knows that Hope ran all the way back. She ran past the area where they went their separate ways. She knows that Hope is long gone, but knowing him, he probably haven't gone far.

After three minutes of running past the waterfall, Lightning stops. "Hope! Hope!" Lightning calls for the kid, but there's no response. Lightning kept searching. She searched all over the Vile Peaks. With each passing minute, she gets more worried. She's afraid the kid got into trouble and she's responsible for it, cause she left him behind.

She finally found Hope. She rushes up to him. Lightning can see the boy is huddled in please, mostly out in the raid. She carefully checks him, he's not having any injures and he appears to be only sleeping.

Lightning sighs in relief, he's okay. Lightning carries Hope in her arms, very carefully just to not wake him up, and moves him into a piggy-back position. Lightnign carries Hope through the rain. They are both completely soaked. I wouldn't be surprised if their undergarments are also wet.

It took about fifteen minutes, but Lightning finally made it back to her resting spot. By the time their back, they're completely waterlogged. They're clothes are pretty clanged onto them like it's their second skin. For Lightning's reason, it's cause of carrying Hope and the clothes on her back were squashed in like a sandwich, or maybe an Oero.

Lightning rests Hope at one end of the ruin airship, for him to rest. The soldier girl reheats her little campfire, just to bring in some warmth, and hopefully will dry them off.

When the first is up, Lightning hears some moaning. She looks back to see Hope is waking up. Hope seats up. "Hey." Hope is startled to hear Lightning's voice. He urns to see the soldier is by the campfire, looking at him with concern. "You okay?"

Hope shook his head while backing away. He's not too happy to be with Lightning, either cause he's afraid of her cause of what he said to her or just he's upset with her cause of...well, you know.

Hope turns his back on Lightning. "G-go...just go away." Hope whispers.

Lightning barely hard it, but she still understand what it was he said. Lightning walks up to him She puts a hand on his back, the mount she touches him, he flinches.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Lightning jerks her hand away. The hope is shaking. "J-just...Just leave me alone!" Hope's voice was quivering in sorrow from that.

Lightning respects Hope's wish. She walks away, but doesn't leave. Instead, she just sits at the edge of the entrance, keeping watch. Hope just stands in the back, shaking and crying. Even under all those loud rain drops, Lightning can still hear the crying Hope.

Hope just can't believe what's happened today. All he wanted is enjoy a little trip with his mom, but inside, he was forced into a Purge train, lost his mother, became a l'Cie, and is now stuck with a soldier girl who treated him like a piece of dirt. That's all she sees in him, just some weak little kid who wants to be protected, but she can't give him that kind of protection.

Hope stops his sobs for a moment, so he could look down at the l'Cie tattoo on his wrist. Even in the darkness and with his vision is blurry from the waterworks, he can see the cursed brand.

Lightning looks at Hope when he stops sobbing. She thought he got over his hurt emotions. Of course that shortly ended when he breaks down crying again. Lightning frowns, feeling heart broken. She understands the pain Hope is going through. The pain of losing someone you hold dear.

She was just a kid, before she became Lightning, she was Claire Farron. Her parents died, and all she had left was Serah. She tried to be strong for Serah's sake, but in truth, she wants someone to hold her, to comfort her, to tell her that everything's going to be okay.

Viewing Hope, Lightning suddenly sees Claire Farron, on her knees crying in front of the tombstones of her parents. This is shocking news to Lightning. Hope...is just like her.

He's weak. He's helpless. He's lost his own mother. Just like she was back when she was helpless, weak Claire. What surprises her more is that his mother was killed cause of Snow. She always know that Villier's was trouble but...being a mother of a helpless child killed? That's pretty intense.

Lightning gets this feeling to comfort Hope, but she knows it won't do any good. Even under all that sorrow and rage, he needs someone to comfort him, just like she once did. But how could she give him what he wants, after the way she treated him.

A thought came to her head. She remembers this one moment she and with her mother, just before her parents died:

_Claire was in her room, crying in her mothers arms._

_"Mommy, I'm scared."_

_"It's okay, Claire. It's okay." Ms. Farron holds Claire close to her. "Mommy's here. You're safe."_

_Claire cries on her mothers shoulder. "Can you sing?"_

_"Of course, my dear."_

The words of the song echoes in Lightning's head. She remembers that song very well. It's been so long since she last heard it, and she never sang it to anyone, not even Serah. By request or of her own will.

Lightning inhales deeply, then, in a soft, gentle, slightly quiet tone, sings.

"It's okay if you just wanna cry, That's what you told me when you wiped the tears away from my eyes." Hope just sits in the back, crying. Acting like he's not hearing anything. "I'm so lucky that you're always there, banishing all my cares; I can't contain my happiness." Lightning stands up, facing directly at Hope. Even though he's not showing it, she knows he can hear her, even under all the loud rain noises outside.

"Though I said some things that I didn't mean, and there's still times that I act so selfishly, through and through, you're always right there beside me." Lightning slowly makes her way to Hope, baby steps as if she's trying to sneak up him on on a ground of bear traps. "And now it's grown so clear; I want you to keep me close and near by your side...Always!" Hope stops crying, only a little. Lightning is right behind the boy.

"It would be a dream come true, If you'd only realize that it's only you who makes me feel this way." Lightning kneels downs, putting a hand on his shaking back. Hope doesn't react to him, just keep drown in his despair. "Oh, how amazing would it be to believe in a new day, where we both could live inside of each other's hearts?" Lightning hope's that the song is working. It worked for her, but will it work for him. They maybe alike, but they're still very different. So then, until the end, won't you please keep watch over me...my dear friend?"

Hope can feel Lightning's arms slowly wrapping around him. He doesn't bother to fight it. "You'll be just fine when you're on your own, that's what you told me when we felt it was time for us to move on." Hope turns his body, so his side is facing Lightning. He lays his head on her shoulder. He doesn't know what's more unbelievable, the song or Lightning comforting him. "And those words keep me from loneliness, so my sky's never gray; I'm better knowing that I can stay strong." Hope could never believe that Lightning, of all people, would do this for him. Even after what he said to her before he left.

"I've opened a door to things strange and new, it's scary facing the unknown when we feel we have to do it all on our own." Hope remembers this song. His mother use to sing it to hi, when he was very little. He use to get so scared and frightened, so Nora sings it to him to calm his fears. "We all fear an undiscovered tomorrow; until I think of how, all the words you gave me are what give me strength for now." Hope remembers the feeling when someone you love comforts you. He always felt that way from his mother. He is now feeling that from Lightning.

Lightning shifts her hand, an arm wrapped around the boys back, and her hand on the back of his head, gently stroking him. "So I will not lose my faith, just as long as I can say all the words my heart has always tucked away;" Hope quiets down on his sobbing. He still cries, but not as loud. All he can hear now is the sound of rain drops, the song and the steady beating of Lightning's heart. "The future will open its arms to show me a new day and embrace me tight with a ray of shining hope." Lightning holds Hope closer to her, trying to make him feel more comfortable. "Cause I know, with all my soul, you will always carry with me in your heart...My dear friend."

There's more, but Lightning pauses the singing. She takes a moment for Hope to relax in her arms. After a minute, Lightning and Hope pulls back. Lightning moves her hands to his shoulders, to find the sad boy looking down. She can't really tell why he is though, either cause he's sad or he's ashamed and scared of her.

Lightning puts a hand on Hope's cheek, wiping away the tears from his eyes. "I understand what you're going through." Lightning says. "I know how it feels to lose someone you hold dear. The sorrow. The pain. The fear." Lightning puts a hand under his chin, tilting his head up so he's facing her. To his surprise, Lightning's expression is a frown with sad eyes. "I was just like you...My parents died when I was a kid. I was so sad. I tried to be strong for Serah but...in truth, it was I who needed the comfort."

Hope opened his mouth a little, but no words came out. He honestly has no words. He's still pretty speechless at what just happened. Lightning leans in, giving the sad boy a soft kiss on the forward. After the kiss, Lightning puts a hand on Hope's head, stroking his hair. "I know I could never replace your mother, but I just want you to know that I am here for you."

Lightning removes her hand. She gives Hope a moment to take in everything she just said. Hope sniffles, closes his eyes and leaps himself into Lightning, wrapping his arms around her waist. Lightning was startled fro the hug, it was so sudden like a surprise attack. Lightning takes a moment before reacting any further. The boy is laying his head on her chest, arms wrapped around her, and crying on her.

Lightning relaxes a little and she returns the hug. She closes her eyes, resting her chin on the boys head. Lightning gently rocks Hope back and forth, trying to comfort him. After a minute of sobs, Hope speaks. Though his voice is a little shaken since his throat is stained with his tears.

"I'm-I'm...I'm sorry. About what I've said." Hope says.

"No, don't apologize...I deserved it." Lightning says. "I shouldn't have left you to fend for yourself. I also shouldn't call you a liability. You are still a kid, Hope, and...I'm sorry."

Tears escape from Lightning's eyes. She didn't bother to fight it. Lightning can feel Hope's pain. The pain of losing his mother. The pain of becoming a l'Cie. The pain of being abandoned by someone who he looks up to.

"Why...why is this happening?" Hope asks. "W-we were just visiting Bodhum. We just wanted to see those fireworks. But...then the Purge happened, and..."

"Shh." Lightning gently stroke Hope's back. "Say no more." Lightning and Hope ends the hug. Hope just drops his hands on his lap, looking up at Lightning. "I'm sorry about what you've been through, Hope." Lightning wipes away his tears. "But don't worry. Everything's going to be okay. It'll get better."

Hope gives a small nod. "P-p-please, Light...Don't leave me. I need you."

"I know. I'm not gonna leave you again." Lightning grabs hold of Hope's hand, then rests her other hand on top of it. "I'm staying right here." Lightning looks back at the exit, noticing the rain is starting to light up. Then she looks back at Hope. "We'll rest for the night, then leave at dawn."

Hope nods. "Okay."

"Come on." Lightning sits right next to Hope. She carefully pulls to boy to lay down. Hope rests his head on her lap. He knows that she wants him to get some rest, even after what he's been through and all that exhaustion he was experiencing.

Lightning strokes her hand on Hope, from shoulder to arm. Hope never expected this kind of kindness and gentleness from Lightning, after knowing her as a cold blooded soldier in the past few hours. Lightning feels a bit out of character. She didn't expect this kind of affection to overcome her. Only once she felt like this for Serah, only because she's her sister. But for a kid she hardly even knows, that's different.

Hope's been through a lot and they're only resting for the night. Lightning figured she would keep comforting him while it lasts. On that note, she finishes the song:

"I promise that I'll never stop moving forward through thick or thin, I'll always remember what you have taught me; our love is something to believe in." Hope listens to Lightning while he's resting. He enjoys the song, and Lightning sings it very beautifully. Probably even more then his mother did. "When I look above, I can see your smile in the sky, its light will comfort me, till we can finally meet one day again."

Hope is suddenly imagining as the song subdues him. He's picturing himself back at home, by the fireplace. Warm and happy, with his mother. "So I will not lose my faith, just as long as I can say all the words my heart has always tucked away;" In their condition, they're in a junkyard area out in the rain, as fugitives being chased by the army. Even under all that...it still feels like that special moment he once had. "The future will open its arms to show me a new day and embrace me tight with a ray of shining hope."

Hope smiles and slowly closed his eyes, to fall asleep. "I would love if you'd only realize that it's only you who makes me feel this way..." Lightning figured that Hope isn't such a bad kid after all. Maybe she will take him with her. She could use some back up. "Oh, how amazing would it be to believe in a new day, where we both could live inside of each other's hearts? So then, until the end, won't you please keep watch over me...My dear friend?"

After the song ends, Lightning looks down at Hope, noticing the kid's asleep. Lightning sighs silently then looks back at their exit. It stopped raining. Lightning figured nothing's gonna come for them tonight, so she takes the opportunity to relax.

Lightning leans back against the metal wall and closes her eyes. "Lightning..." Hope's voice was quiet and soft. Even under that, she still heard him. Hope turns, so he's looking at Lightning with his eyes slightly opened. "Thank you."

Lightning smiles. "No problem."


End file.
